Thursday, January 21, 2010

How do you train a bat?

Edward has been very busy lately with taking care of his new pet. He started to complain about how much of his time it seems to take to make sure Vlad is well fed, played with, cleaned, and rested. Yes, Vlad sleeps. Who knew? Edward and I were surprised, too. Anyway, Vlad's behavior was a concern of Edward's before we got Vlad home. Edward didn't know what to expect as far as Vlad's tempermant and just general activities he would be prone to doing. I told Edward that I didn't know either. I trained dogs not bats. So he better keep a tight reign on Vlad until we know for sure so the bat doesn't go running a muck around the house. And the first thing you teach him, Edward, is to not bite the dog! Got it? Edward:"That's funny, the first thing I was going to teach was to bite the dog." What was that???? Edward:"Oh, nothing. Rule one, don't bite the werewolf. Got it." And Edward blames Bella for being stubborn. A little hypocritical, are we?

So, back to Vlad. He was fairly tame at first, which was a plus. So I told Edward two important things that are very helpful when dealing with a pet that doesn't know you yet. First, let him know that you are in charge, or the alpha if you will. Edward:"If I'm the alpha, does that mean I am the alpha to the werewolf, too?" No Edward, you are not the werewolf's alpha, I am. I mean dog!! Crap. Edward:"You said werewolf!! You admitted it!!" You tricked me! You mind ninja-d me. That's not fair, it was a mistake. Edward:...smirks with superiority....... Enough!! On with the training. So, again, first make your place as the alpha. And second, food is the best way to gain trust with most animals, as long as they are not finicky eaters, that is. So Edward took my advice and soon enough Vlad was completly inseperable from Edward. I would assume that some really intense chipmunk feeding frenzy sharing is to thank for that.

Then Edward decided to get into some real training. He came to me, asking so many questions about simple commands and actions. We talked for hours about it. Edward really does have a thirst for knowledge. He decided to start with basics. Here he is leash training.

He looks like such a pro. I was so proud of him. Edward got Vlad to heal with him only after a few minutes. After seeing how talented he was at training his pet, Edward considered for a moment becoming a dog trainer. I told him that might be a good idea if the dogs wouldn't growl, snarl, bark and drool with their hackles up and then run away in his presence. Edward:"True.."

The next day, at work, Edward decided to try something more complex. Stay, then coming when called. I explained to him the simple procedure then he went off to try.

"Vlad, stay."

"Come here, boy!"

"Good boy!!"
Edward was so proud. You should have seen it. It was so cute. I told Edward to keep practicing that comand. It is invaluable if your pet ever starts running into the street. He nodded vehemently. Edward is really becoming smitted with the little bat.
Feeling lucky, and succesful, Edwad tried somethig a lot more complicated. He wanted to see if Vlad could learn to Fetch. He asked me if I thought it was possible. Again, I played the I don't know, I trained dogs not bats card again. But encouraged him to try. You never know. So Edward found a little ball and set Vlad a bit away from him in preperation.

"Fetch the ball, Vlad.............go on.................go get it, boy.............come on, you can do it.........."
Unfortunatly, Edward was not having as much luck with this one. This went on for some time.

"Vlad, get the ball. It's right have to move.......why are you just staring at it?........Pretend it's a chipmunk..............this is a simple task...........I don't think he is gonna do it."
I don't either, Edward. Just give him a break, and try again later. He might need to learn it in steps. It's not impossible. Focus on what he is good at for now. Edward:"Ok."
Since I very rarely leave the house without Edward, he needed to find a way to bring Vlad with us everywhere, too. This is something that I wish I would have thought of before I had Edward get a pet. Oh well, what's done is done. Edward had a good thought:"Since I always go in your purse, why don't we just attach Vlad to it. I mean, he came with a handy built in key chain attachment. Why don't we just utilize that?" Edward is brilliant. Here he is attaching Vlad to my purse before leaving the house.

"I know you don't like being tied up like this, but it's only for a short time, I promise, little buddy."
I tried to hid my giggle when Edward said little buddy. But it didn't do any good. He caught me. I thought I was going to get it for that, but I was surpised that he only smiled shyly and looked away. Edward is really starting to develope real emotion for his pet. He is really coming a long way. I am so glad. Edward really has been a lot more easy to live with since the addition to Vlad. It's like he is a different vampire..........sometimes.
I guess there is no greater bond than between a boy and his bat.

Saturday, January 16, 2010


Some Edward Randomness.....

Wow, I haven't blogged since last year!! I've been slacking. I guess I can't get out of the holiday comatose.....Anyway, I thought that I would give you some random stuff of Edward in his daily life. Not too much exciting here, but it's part of living with Edward, so I feel obligated to share.

This took place not long after Edward's arrival here. It really shows his early twentieth century cordialness and care of formalities.

"Hello. I'm sorry I didn't get a chance to indroduce myself last week. I'm Edward Cullen. You're Venom."

After indroducing himself, Edward wondered if he had anything in common with Venom, given his sirname.......I don't think so Edward.

Edward was challened to a game of hide and seek by a very dense and clueless duck. The duck really thought he could beat Edward at this game. I think he gave into the dumb pretty boy stereotype, not taking into account that Edward may have some "mad skills". I honestly don't know what the duck was thinking about the hiding spot he chose. He must have thought Edward was really mentaly inept.

"Behind a tissue? Really? That's the spot you chose? Stupid duck."

In this photo, I think it is pretty obvious what Edward is doing. I don't believe I need to elaborate there......
"Look what I can do! Look what I can do!" That's special Edward.

This day Edward was in an especialy bad mood. He could not settle down for anything looking for some kind of distraction. He was flipping through the songs on my MP3 player over and over until he finally gave up looking for a song that was to his liking for the moment.

"No Debussy? Seriously?"

So Edward went to the glove compartment to fiddle through some CDs. Thankfully he found something that would entertain him. If he didn't, I may have thrown him out the window going 80 down the highway.

"Here, put this on, now....please." That's right you better use some manners! Hmmm...the latest 100 Monkeys album....interesting.

These last few pics are of Edward at work with me. He can get really bored there at times given the lack of fun vampy things to do there, but he is a trooper and comes with me every day. One day my coworker bought a Wendy's kids meal for lunch and gave me the toy it came with. I'm not quite sure what that gesture meant, but I shrugged it off and investigated said toy. It happed to be a puzzle so I offered it to Edward to curb his bordom. He took the task pretty seriously and was getting it together quickly and efficiantly. To be honest, I would be very concerned if he couldn't finish it in about a minute, it's meant for a child. When Edward realized how quickly it was getting done, he decided to slow down and take his time being that we had hours before we were going to leave.

"What on earth is that girl wearing? Alice would cringe. And why is the monkey so angry? The girl is just standing there smiling like a goon like she doesn't even notice. It doesn't take a mind reader to see that he is upset." Wow, Edward.

"Which one is it? I don't think it's either. Wait...all these pieces are shaped the same..."

"This one seems to have a part of a building on it, but this one does too. I think that might be the end of the monkey's ear......" I left Edward to his own devices after the strange rambling started. He laughed to himself when he saw me make the 'whoa, Edward is weird' look. He does like to entertain. When the puzzle was complete he was pleased to see that the other sides of the pieces had indiviual letters on them to spell words with......he decided to have a little fun with this.

I have to admit, I laughed when I saw 'undead'. He waited for me to appraise his work. I just laughed and shook my head. He seemed pleased knowing he got a laugh out of me. So I told him he was very creative and gave him a little pat on the head very carefully as to not knock him over. When he exhausted his use for the puzzle pieces, he quickly starded running all around them tearing them to shreds basically turning them to dust. I stared wide eyed asking him why he would do that. He answered, "I'm sorry. Did you want to play, too?" I replied with a simple stern "Edward", which only caused him to laugh at me. I didn't include a pic of him with the destroyed puzzle because bad things happen when I encourage his random destructive behavour.