Friday, November 12, 2010

Fall Candids

Edward has been quite the active vampire this Fall. He has participated in quite a few events. I think it may be his favorite time of year. Now thinking about it, I find it ironic that his favorite time of year consists of Halloween. Hmmmm. Interesting.

Anyway, here is Edward taking over my bag of candy corn. He is really trying to get me to stay away from sweets because of my fitness goals. He is quite the little tyrant helper.

"No love, it's too high in sugar.  You must resist!"  It was just as well anyway.  It was the worst candy corn ever.  Always remember to buy the Brachs brand, never the bulk crap.  It was truly heinous.

Every year we take my nephew to the farm and get pumpkins and gourds from their luscious pumpkin patch.  Edward loves going to the farm.  But not because I get to take cute pictures of him there, like this:

He loves it more for this:

He's a naughty little vampire sometimes.

Another Fall tradition we have is going to a 10 acre corn maze at night.  It is so much fun!  I suggest to at least try it once.  Edward found it way to easy because he could track our sent and tell where we had been already.  So I told him to shut up because he was taking the fun out of it.  He obliged and just went along for the ride snuggled in the neck of my fleece.  He did get to investigate some of the corn though.  He was a bit perplexed.

"Um, it's hairy."
"Yeah, so?"
"That's weird.  It's corn.  I wasn't aware that it reached puberty."
"Are you jealous?"
"Grrrr.  If you make the next left, then a quick right and follow it for 30 feet and take the next left, you will find the exit."
"Uhg!!  You suck!"
"Yes, well, I am a vampire."
"Oh god, and you're bad at making jokes."
"Your mom is bad at making jokes."
"There, that's better."

After we finished the maze, we looked at some of the more quirky things at the corn maze.  Edward found something that pissed him off.

"Don't you dare raise your hand to my human!!  I'll rip you to pieces you filthy stinking mutt!!"
Edward then did something that made us have to leave that area of the farm very quickly.

We found a safer place for Edward to get into less trouble then.

Here are some pumpkins that are a bit more Edward size.

But then Edward had to find trouble again.  I don't know why he just can't follow rules sometimes.  He certainly didn't learn it from me.

I was surprised that the scale actually registered his little vampy weight.

According to this, Edward is about 2 ounces.  That sounds fairly accurate to me.
I planned on carving a pumpkin this year.  I haven't done it since I was a kid.  I forgot that it takes a really long time.  I thought it would be a good project to have the Edwards help me with.  They were more than happy to help.  So after I cut the top of the pumpkin off, Edward and EC went to work pulling out all the pulp and seeds.

But they didn't like it.
"This is so disgusting!"
"I can not believe this smell!"
"That's it.  I'm done."
"Then so am I."
"Sorry love.  But we just.....can't.  It's ....for lack of better nasty as watching the cast of the Jersey Shore do ......well just about anything.'"
"Whoa, that's pretty nasty."
So off the Edwards went to go get cleaned up and get away from the nastiness of the pumpkin.

But Edward did let me get a photo of him with the finished product.

Isn't it a cute little scarecrow?  I love it.

Edward also sat with us to wait for the trick-or-treaters. 

I didn't think this was a good place for him to wait.  He thought it was hysterical.
"Come on.  It's funny.  What better trick could there be than getting a vampire in your candy?"
"Edward,  Kids want treats, not tricks.  And I'm pretty sure tricks are punishable by law now."
"America takes the fun out of everything.  I hate all this politically correct bullcrap."
"Tell me about it."
So Edward went on for about an hour telling me about it.   I will never use that phrase with him again.

Then we decided on a better place for Edward to wait.

"Hey, love, guess where I'm hiding."
"Where Edward?"
"Your mums."
"Ha!  Good one."

Stay tuned for the next post.  The Edwards had a Halloween party complete with costumes.  It was pretty epic.


Twired Jen said...

He he...He does love Fall! Great pics. I'm so happy to have my mini-E from Lisa.

PS that pumpkin rocks.

xo J

Alleykittty said...

I jut love love your blog , so frigging funny all the shenenigans Edward gets up to. Perfect!
So verry well done! :D

TheRugbymom said...

"Ha! Good one!"

Well said, Edward! Love it!

TwitardedMom said...

Genius. The fall activities were hilarious as usual.

Trixie and Tess said...

OH these are SO fantastic. We would get along so well together!! I love it!!

Congrats on winning the giveaway!! Be sure you let me know how you want the autograph personalized!!

Have a fabulous Friday!!

P.S. My word verification is: sucks. LOL. Just made me laugh, had to share.

Dangrdafne said...

I had tons I wanted to say and it got lost when I read "Your Mums!" ROFLMAO!!!! Oh goodness that is hilarious!!!

Great pictures. Great stories. It's the Great Pumpkin Charlie Brown... ok not really but it seemed to fit.

P.S. I LOVE candy corn - shocking, right?? ;)

Jaymes805 said...

Hahaha this made my day. Awesome awesome blog. Can't wait to see the Edwards' halloween costumes! :)

Charla said...

I love it! Your pictures are adorable! It looks like Edward is in mighty fine hands!

17foreverlisa said...

I'm with Sharon. "Your Mums" cracked me up.

Love it. Love you. Love Edward :)


TongueTwied said...


Nice job carving the pumpkin! It came out adorable. Leave it to Edward to find the wolf and threaten him!

Mrs. P @ TwiBite said...

Your mums!!!!!! LMAO!!!!!
Corn reaches puberty??? LOL!
I can't believe you stuck them in the pulp...oh too funny.